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It's certainly been a little while since i logged anything on here. I havn't really been home though since i met Jes, we're doing awesome, totally into each other. She's so great, we meld really well. I havn't been training a whole lot, although i did do a 4.5 hour ride yesterday. It was supposed to be 5 hours, but my eating habbits havn't been all that consistent and i bonked promptly at 4 hours. I limped home with Carl in tow. I still have a lot of confidence about this race, i may not finish as fast as i wanted to, but i WILL finish it, no doubt about that. the swim and bike are nothing to me, the run still worries me, but i'm going to do a 15 mile run soon and see how it feels. Then 17, 18. and 20 two weeks before the event.

Things with Jes are going really well. We have a very honest and open way of talking to each other and it's helped resolve some issues before they became issues The only downside to seeing her right now is my training is suffering and i'm not getting much sleep...or eating on a regular basis. But today i plan on running after work, then going over her house. I know that if we don't have a full blown relationship, Jes and i will definitely be awesome friends

Anyway, Jeff is back - his father passed away last saturday. He's going to collect his stuff and drive the U-Haul back to maine. He's only back for three days, which sucks because i was hoping he'd stay longer so we could go to a park, or a spring and just chill for a whole day. THose plans would have been ruined though because Randy got fired last night after flipping his lid and talking back to our Director of Operations. THe DO called me and said that he's going to move me up, and soon.

Thats good financially, but it's not how i wanted it to happen, i didn't want to take my friends job. It's a moral thing i'm going to be struggling with, and also if they make me GM i'll be skipping two levels of management, so it'll definitely add more pressure and paperwork and more hours then i'm already giving. That means less time for my ironman training. I guess we'll have to see what happens.

After work last night, Jes called me and we met at the restaraunt to go out. She took me downtown to Chillers. It's been 4 years since i've been downtown and at first it brought back bad memories, but as the night rolled on and with the help of Jes and her friends being very nice and friendly, it turned out to be pretty ok. My lower back hurts from dancing, but i'll get over it. I jumped on the scale this morning, and i'm 210. I've dropped 25 pounds in a month without a ton of training. Just goes to show that i was not eating properly before.

Anyway i had a fantastic time with Jes and i'm so glad i've found someone that is funny, outgoing, sarcastic...she challenges me and thats always what i've looked for. Someone to not just nod their head at me all the time, but to contribute to my life in some way. Jes will definitely do that. She even brought me over to 'Puffer Bird's' house. Puffer bird is an elderly lady that she watches occaisionally on the weekend, and Pufferbird had to approve of me before we could take things further (half joking). When we arrived from the club Puffer and I hit it off very well, and she invited me back...which is something she hasn't done to any of Jes's boyfriends. Puffer is the nicest old lady i've ever met, and her dog is very affectionate too, without being over bearing heheh. We had some good laughs, and then when the conversation turned serious i apparently answered her questions satisfactorily. So i'm thinking this is going to go somewhere. All i gotta do now is make sure i still train.

Jes has not had a very good track record with boys...always picking the wrong ones and she has let down a few of her defenses, but hte biggest and strongest ones will take some time to lower. I'm just going to be myself, let her know that i care about her not by telling her (well i will on occaision) but by proving it over time. Just let things roll.

ok so, i got called into work yesterday...suck. But i met "Jes" which rocks (we talked for 4 hours on the phone last night). But my bosses car got stolen. Suck. what a dramatic day.

oh yeah, and as i thought, my boss and i kissed and made up. we're stronger now for it.

I have a new Article up on triathlete.com. Check it out and let me know how you feel on my little forum (Leave a message at the beep)

the hardest decision i ever made was the decision to become me. no that doesn't make me super duper or anything. It just makes me non-tolerant of most of societies bullshit. Today my boss was scheduled to work and instead he decided to go to a barbecue. When i arrived to work the place was in shambles, i had a line out the door, and i was running out of stuff. The district manager happened to call me and i told him what i was up against. He called my manager and told him to go in like he was supposed to. WTF. So you guessed it, my manager comes in and gives me a rash of shit saying he ne ver gets a dya off...blah blah blah. What an asshole. If he was scheduled off, i could understand, but he was SCHEDULED TO WORK.

After the bullshit he pulled tonight, i called the district manager myself personally and asked him if i was able to relocate if things didn't smooth over tomorrow. He said no problem. THat gives me leverage. and i'm going to use that leverage to make sure my manager apologizes...or loses his best employee. Don't play games with me bitch, if you think life is hard now...i'll xfer to another store, and i'll take three employees with me.

I finally got off my ass, didn't drink, or eat pizza, and ran. Did a quick 4 miles before work and boy do i feel awesome. I had a few bad days this week, but i'm back now. Tomorrow i'm going for a ride and hit the pool. I got scheduled for my monday which is my long run day, i think i'll try and go to bed right away tomorrow night and get up at 8, run for 2.5 hours then go to work. ick.

On a good note, i have wednesday AND thursday off, so i can do my long ride and recover thursday instead of working.

tonight i ran about 12 miles (2:15). Running in the dark is scary and exhilerating. One thing that sucks about the run route i have, is all the hills are at the end, so after i've been running for two hours, i got fifteen minutes of rollers, and boy do they hurt. But it's done, and i'll do it again next week, hopefully the hills will make the flat IM course seem easier.

I have to say that i'm pretty happy with my weight loss and my performance overall. I havn't been in the pool in awhile but i'm not too worried about it right now. Gotta take some benedryl and go to bed right when i get home tonight, i got a long run in the morning. Work has been super stressful, but it's about to get better as the day manager who is totally jealous of me, will be moving to another store, giving me free reign over my shift. No more butting heads.

Today i learned a valuable lesson: Don't go riding without a spare tube. I was having a really good ride, feeling great, when all of a sudden:

psst.

Psst.

Psst.

I thought my chain was rubbing my deraillur, but then my back tire started to wobble and i knew i had a flat. I was about 1 mile from the house, so i walked it, in my bare feet. Not fun.

ANyway i'd like to make a plug for the Carb-One pump. I dont' care that it weighs negative 4 pounds. I don't care that it's small and compact. What i carea bout is the ease of use and the quickness in which i was able to inflate my tire (only to have it deflate a few seconds later). I used a couple other pumps and their unweildy and generally a pain in the ass to use. This one seemed like it was assisted, because i pumped the tire up rock hard with little effort.

oh yea, and "E" and i never went out. Turns out she wasn't interested. wtf.

Oh yeah, another note: I'm pretty positive i'll LOOK like how i want to look when November comes around. The weight is still dropping finally and i'm starting to really like the way i'm looking. :)

2 hour run today. I was pretty tired at the end, my legs were sorta draggin, but my aerobicness (my term for breathing and HR) was excellent. Kept my HR below 140 for most of it. I think i'll do my long ride on Friday, then do anotehr long run on my planned Monday.

Let me introduce Jeff. I met Jeff when i was 15 at the Card Cage (where i met Carl too) back in highschool. shit...i don't really feel like going t hrough the details, but let me put it to you this way. If you're reading this, think of any one person thats been in your life for longer then 5 years, and you feel like they're a rock in your life. A standard. The person you know you can always go to no matter what the occaision and you know that person will be honest with you and try and help you. That's Jeff.

Jeff's father is dying. I didn't think i'd be affected as much by it, but i am. I just got off the phone with Jeff and i just couldn't help but remember every time i was over his house, his father was always had something funny to say. But his humor wasn't like most peoples. See, Conrad was the hardest old fashioned worker you've ever met. And in being so, his opinion was...straight forward and just - funny.

Conrad had some leisions on his brain that needed to be surgically removed, and from there other cancerous problems developed. He's going to die, and the saddest thing about it is - the same things Jeff tells me about his dad, my friend Kelly told me about her dad just before he died this year. I can't go into details, it's too hard. But know that i'm hurt by this event. And i'm glad i'm hurt, because i'm glad i can feel pain and sympathy in a life where i really feel like i can be more like a robot when it comes to feelings - turning them on and off at will.

I'm going to call my mom and see what she thinks.

As for today:

Lunch with Dan at World Gym
Dinner with "E"

heheh, check this site out. Look familiar?

I'm flattered Oleg.

I suppose it's been awhile since i wrote here...but i've been busy - so busy. If i'm not workikng or training or sleeping...i'm trying to find more time to do those three things.

I did a spritn race on Sunday and it turned out pretty horrible. My first DNF! My swim was amazing..till i almost drowned from inhaling so much water. I was on pace for about 7:20 for 1/4 mile but ended up with 8:07 for having to stop and get water out of my lungs. The bike was terrible....and i DNF'd on the run because i was feeling crappy and my toe opened up and started to hurt real bad. Oh well, i wasn't really plannign on racing anyway. My speed has suffered a bit, but my endurance is way up, so you can't have both i guess.

I need to do a long run today, but i've got to meet Dan at noon for lunch, and meet "E" for a date at 6. Wherever will i fit it all in?

Good news is i'm still losing weight.

Bad news is, my buddy Jeff's dad has two weeks to live. My buddy and old training partner Carl's grandmother died.

Good news is Jedd A. has offered to enter me into the Olympic at Disney which is a race i wanted to do as a step to the ironman. Thanks Jedd! yes, his name is Jedd for real.

Maybe he'll sponsor me and get me a bunch of new clothes with Team Jed(d) on em!

4 hours in the saddle today...felt pretty good. Half way through i hit a rough patch, but i finished strong. Then i went to eat at Crispers, then had an icecream. At the icecream parlor i pulled open the door and the metal corner hit my big toe...and tore a gash in it. oh my did it hurt. The first thing i thought when it happened, right after the white flash was, "Oh damn..no pool or running! What am i going to do about IMFL?!!!"

After examining the wound and pujtting some neosporin on it, i'm confident that most of the wound is superficial (down by the nail its quite a bit deeper) but it will heal and i'll be running and swimming in 2 days tops. So is life. damn my toe hurts

tonights close was good at work, i took some benedryl to get myself some sleep...and tomorrow mornign when carl arrives we'll hit the road for 4-4.5 hours. Then i gotta go into work, do the schedule, get my check, then probably see a flick and relax the resto f the dya. I also have to get into chillies to see "E". Shes interestred in me, but we keep missing each other when we go to visit. Hopefully i'll catch her this time. I also have to go to Outback this friday to see "J".

Remember my M.O. - get 3-4 girls interested and have all of them stop calling within 14 days. I have no reason to believe this will be different, but shit...i gotta try! Randy, my boss says that i need to be more aggressive and fuck everyone else and what they say. So thats what i'm going to do, back to doing what jed thinks he should be doing (with some coaching from the boss!) heheh.

I'm happy to report that i'm able to walk today! I really thought i over did it with the hills last night (this morning)and that i'd be suffering because of it, but i can feel my calves...but they're not wrecked like i thought they'd be. Thats good news.

I got to talk to the Director of Operations last night for our area Moe's. Really nice guys, and they clued me in on a few ways that i can prove to them that i can handle my own store. Nothing like getting it direct from the source!

so it's 2 am tuesday morning, and true to my word, i walked out hte door for my long run. Since it's dark, and i know a few houses have unleashed dogs, i decided to take a different route and just run an hour out, then back. I guess it doesn't matter where i go, there's always going to be dogs. *sigh*. plus running around in unfamiliar area in the dark was unpleasant. But other than that, when i wasn't being barked at, and in areas i knew, it was very nice. The weather was perfect, and i just ran in the middle of the road, the road was mine for a few hours.

My calves are totally blasted from the rolling hills, ande my feet hurt a bit which i'm going to blame on working on my feet for 8 hours a day now. Overall i did 1:38 and i was really hurting on the way back. I turned around not only because of that, but because the street stopped having street lamps...not my idea of fun.

Tomorrow i'll do something really easy to keep my legs from locking up, then i'll do my long ride with carl on wed.